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“Nolte te Bastardes” Coffee Table Makeover Kit


This Glasshouse Girl DIY Kit contains all the materials you need to give your coffee table (or another small piece of furniture) a “Nolte te Bastardes” stencil top makeover!  Full instruction are included with more hints and tips on top of those detailed in the tutorial on my blog!

The kit contains:


  • 80 grit ‘surface stripping’ sandpaper
  • 3 x Foam paint brushes (1 x small, 1 x medium, 1 x large)
  • 1 x coarse grit sanding/smoothing pad
  • 1 x easy stencilling pouncer
  • 100ml acrylic colour coat in June Red, Serena Teal, Martha Grey or Commander Black
  • 50ml white chalk stencil paint
  • 50ml weathered oak waterbased wood stain
  • 50ml stain waterbased wood varnish
  • 2 x paper plates
  • 1 x paper bowl
  • 1 x A4 Glasshouse Girl “Nolte te Bastardes” mylar stencil
  • FREE BONUS GIFT: 1 x small Glasshouse Girl male/female equality symbol mylar stencil

I had an amazing A-Level English Lit teacher who introduced me to The Handmaid’s Tale.  This was over 20 years ago (boo!) but the lessons in this sci-fi novel have never left me. With the amazing recent Hulu series, I felt like “Nolte te Bastardes Carbondurum” is a true call to action for this generation – join the revolution with your own coffee table makeover.

This is a stylish, subtle and surprisingly achievable upcycle!  Do it the Glasshouse way and come home from work every day knowing that you won’t “Let the bastards get you down”!

I have preregistered for my copy of Margaret Atwood’s sequel novel – The Testaments – have you?!


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Nolite te Bastardes Carborundorum Coffee Table – June Red
Nolite te Bastardes Carborundorum Coffee Table – June Red
This coffee or side table was inspired by the Margaret Atwood novel - The Handmaid's Tale which I studied during my English A-Levels and is now an incredible TV show from Hulu! In a world that is going crazy all around us, whether you are a man or a woman, we could all do with a daily reminder - Nolite te Bastardes Carborundorum which roughly translates (in pigeon Latin) as "Don't Let the Bastards Get You Down". This vintage French style oak table has been sanded all the way back to the wood.  A custom Glasshouse Girl stencil has been designed and applied to the surface before topcoating with a Weathered Oak stain and multiple layers of gloss varnish. The base has been undercoated and topcoated with three coats of 'June Red'.  It has then been finished with an antiquing glaze which brings out the detail and makes the red 'pop'! Dimensions: 69cm square x 55.5cm high. If you fancy having a go yourself on your own coffee table, the stencil is available for sale as well as a full 'How To' blog post AND a DIY kit including all the paint, stencils and brushes!
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